One Door Closes and Another One Opens

This morning was interesting. I checked my e-mail (of course, because I have a major e-mail checking OCD) and I had two e-mails. The first one was from the Steppenwolf Theatre in Chicago which I applied for an apprenticeship at. This apprenticeship is something I wanted so bad. I don't think I can possibly explain how badly I wanted it. And I actually thought I was a great candidate for the position. Well, the e-mail from them today said they had many qualified candidates blah blah blah but that I wasn't one of them. Well it didn't say that exactly but it said they couldn't offer me an apprenticeship at this time and I should apply again next year. Uggh. Whatever.

The second e-mail I open is from another theater in Chicago called Collaboraction. I found a posting for a job opening at that theater earlier this week and sent them my resume at about 2 a.m. Friday morning. So unlike Steppenwolf, who I waited nearly two months to hear back from Collaboraction responded in eight hours. Anyway, I have a phone interview for a part-time marketing coordinator!!

I just really can't get over how my first e-mail says no job for you and the next one is an interview. It's pretty exciting!! Being a marketing coordinator at a theater is basically exactly what I want to do (I think).

But now is the stressful job of trying to figure out how to sound smart and professional and act like I know what I'm talking about for my phone interview on Monday.

It's weird because I have been wanting and talking about moving to Chicago for along time now but all of a sudden I'm seriously freaking out. I think it's because it's actually a for real possiblity now. I'm close to a time where I can actually do it. However, I am beginning to doubt myself. I don't know if I really can go and move to the big city all by myself. I'm starting to really like Minneapolis and there is a much bigger performing arts community here than I had realized. I have many friends around here, it's closer to home...but on the other hand I've never imagined myself staying in Minnesota my whole life.

I guess I'll have to see how this interview goes. I'm excited for the interview but in all honesty I can't imagine that I'll actually get the job. Am I really ready for a real life job...Ugghh!! I guess...I've had two internship and a four-year degree training me in this right? SO SCARY!!

Maybe I'll move to Chicago for at least a year. Most apartment leases are for at least a year...so I could just go and if I hate it move back. Or maybe I'll just stay here...I need guidence!!

Overall, life is great. I don't think I could be any happier in any area. Although I do get a tad bored and wish I could spend more time with my friends. But work, family/friend relationships are all good and believe it or not I might actually have a bit of a dating life!! CRAZY!!

But for some reason lately I keep getting the most ridiculous advice about meeting guys from family members. My grandma said I need to go buy a tennis racket and start playing tennis. Find a court somewhere around me and go there frequently so I can meet men. She told me to go hit some balls...
My uncle on the other hand says he'll teach me how to golf so I can meet men that way. The advice is all greatly appreciated...

Give me a 10 for Cutest Pet

Give me a 10 for Cutest Pet

Recent College Grad with No Confidence Seeks Job

Today I had the stupidest thought. I have been wanting to move to Chicago for some time now. But today I was thinking that maybe I should just stay in Minneapolis. Stay in Minneapolis because I know people and have friends here. Not that it's stupid that I want to stay with my friends but to stay because I am scared of not making new friends. I know I can. It'll be hard at first but I'll be able to meet new people in Chicago. I just thought it was so dumb of me to question whether or not I could do it.

I'm updating the resume...always fun. I've found some more theaters to apply at. Hopefully something will come up. It may sound naive but I have all the faith in the world that my Lord will help me end up exactly where I need to be. Because of my past I know for sure, with all my heart everything happens for a reason.

And it's not that I'm totally ruling out staying in Minneapolis, it's just that I've had it in my head to move to a bigger city. But since being here and DRIVING around here...Minneapolis is a big city! Haha. Obviously if something happens for me to stay here I will.

Job searching is more stressful/annoying then I had expected it to be. I keep finding internships, paid internships that I know I could get but really how many internships can someone have...specially a college graduate. I know I need to get a real life job, but I won't lie, that scares the CRAP out of me!! I dont' know what I'm doing...

A part of me loves how uncertain everything is right now...the world is my oyster! But the other part is scared to death.

Am I a Narcissist?

Why am I writing a blog? I do like to write but I'm going to tend to write about myself in this blog...so does that make me a narcissst?

I just got back from spending my last semester of school in London. Best four months of my life thus far, no joke. I had some of the best/amazing/awkward experiences of my life.

As soon as I got back I graduated from college after 5 years and now I'm in Minneapolis for the summer doing an internship. And after August? Who the hell knows...ecspecially me!!

I'm excited about the open road in front of me but it also scares the shit outta me. I feel like if I make a wrong choice right now it's going to ruin my life. Which I know is ridiculous...in my logical mind I know that is a stupid thought. But I feel like I have all this pressure on me now to all of a sudden know what I want to do for the rest of my life.

Anyway, I'm trying to figure out my future, my life, I'm even trying to figure out what I believe in anymore (love, religion) So maybe writing a blog all about myself and my struggle to find my place is narcissistic...but you're reading it right now...so it's not all my fault. Right?